Four Threads

Newlywed

What's Your Love Language?

Veronica ArrietaComment
What's your love language? | Four Threads

Have you heard of the 5 love languages? I had always assumed that the language that makes us feel loved is the same language that others feel, but that's where I'm mistaken. The five love languages are: Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time and Physical Touch. 

For example, my love language is Words of Affirmation, which is spot on for me. I feel most loved with a positive verbal gesture that shows that you care. An "I love you" or "great job" makes me feel acknowledged and loved.  

Interestingly enough, Mike's love language is Quality Time, which means that my verbal affirmation doesn't really do the trick with him. Instead, he feels most loved when we're spending one-on-one time together, whether we're on a date night or just sitting on the couch and talking. Realizing this has really helped both of us in becoming better partners to each other. In fact, there's already been a few instances in our marriage where I've had to say "no" to certain things because we needed quality time with one another. 

So you're not in a romantic relationship? Lucky for you, these love languages translate to friendships and even parent/child relationships too. This can truly change relationships across the board -  the fascinating thing is you could be missing each other's love language all along. 

What's your love language? How do you show love to someone with a different love language than you? If you don't know your love language, take the test here.

Wedding Planning Tips And Lessons I've Learned

WeddingVeronica Arrieta3 Comments
Wedding Planning Tips | Four Threads

As you already know, I tied the knot in November. Now that the wedding is over, I've had some time to reflect on the planning process as a whole. The process can be stressful with all the details, trying not to hurt anyone's feelings, keep your groom around, etc. But at the end of the day you need to enjoy the it because you only get married once! Lately, after looking at Facebook and Instagram, I feel like I have more friends that are engaged then not so I've decided to jot down a few things I learned on my way to the aisle.

  1. Set Time For Wedding Talk. Most of us could talk all day about wedding color schemes, invitations, favors, bouquets, bridesmaid dresses…sorry what was I talking about again...oh yeah! But if your fiancé is anything like mine was, then you know they get tired of hearing about wedding stuff all day. Literally, within the first 48 hours of getting engaged I was already pinning away and making up guest lists (mind you we were still in Hawaii - proposal story here) - he wanted to kill me! The only thing in my vocabulary was wedding. Luckily he pulled me out of the wedding-trans after a few weeks and brought me back down to reality. It was from that point on that I knew we needed to still be us during our engagement and I needed to learn how to turn off the wedding talk. So each week we set a certain amount of time to discuss the wedding so that it didn't take over and still allowed us to be a normal couple talking about normal things…like how the other person's day was.  
  2. Don't Be Afraid To Delegate Your Friends And Family.This was huge for me, I'm a big perfectionist and was terrified of giving things to my bridesmaids with the fear of it not being done right. But boy was I digging myself in a huge hole or what! I remember standing in my living room and looking at all the corks that needed cutting and jars to be filled with honey and lost it. A quick phone call to my friends and poof help was there! This is when I learned that you need to reach out to people around you to keep your sanity. 
  3. Take a marriage class together. We took ours with our church but I would definitely recommend taking it before walking down the aisle. Ours was five weeks long but really helped us talk about our expectations going into marriage, family history, finance, sex, love language and communication. I don't care if you've been dating 7 years or 7 months…take it, you will not regret investing this time into your marriage. The lessons we learned and practiced during our classes sets us up for success today. No, I'm not saying we're perfect but it's nice to be able to put those lessons to use (and it's definitely stopped a few escalated arguments). 

I'd love to hear any lessons you learned along the way, leave a note in the comments below.

Four Threads

Love Is Hard

Veronica Arrieta2 Comments
Love Is Hard | Four Threads

Love is a beautiful thing but it's a process - it's something that takes time, it's about compromise. To me, love means that you want to dedicate your life to someone - in my case, my husband. Yes, there are (and will be) times that it's hard to love him, times when I question our love towards each other, but also times when I love him so much that I can explode. 

Love is something so important to me and I found it with my husband. Throughout our relationship, I've learned that everyday you have to work at love. Sure, there are days that I don't want to show love but I made a commitment to love him unconditionally for the rest of my life.

If you're married or in a relationship, you should enter with the expectation that love is hard; but it's amazing at the same time. Not everything is going to go as planned, you're going to face challenges, you're going to argue, you're going to experience milestones and life together but at the end of the day you have your best friend...you're on the same team! 

10 Things I've Learned From Marriage

Veronica Arrieta4 Comments
10 Things I've Learned From Marriage | Four Threads

Marriage will teach you a lot but then again, what else would you expect when you put two different people together for the rest of your life. You learn about each other and you learn about yourself.

I’ve only been married for a few months now but keep getting asked if married life is any different. After truly reflecting about our life as a married couple, I've come up with 10 things I've learned from marriage thus far - some serious and some not much:

1. My days of eating rice cakes with peanut butter and fruit for dinner are over. Sometimes after a long day the last thing you want to do is make dinner; yes there is always take out but you can't order in every night. Living on my own, it was easy to whip up something quick (i.e. PB&J, eggs, etc) but now with the two of us making a hearty meal is important. 

2. Patience is a virtue. I've always been a pretty patient person but marriage has taken it to a whole other level... just wait until we have kids (yikes!). 

3. My trash TV watching has decreased dramatically. The Bachelor, award shows, reality shows, Fashion Police, Bravo...I think you can catch my drift! My husband refuses to watch this (unfortunately don't blame him) so DVR and his late work dinners have been my best friend!

4. Life is better when you can share it with your best friend. This may seem pretty self explanatory but it's true. Just in these first few months, my life seems so much fuller with Mike in it. 

5. I'm trying to keep the house tidy. This one has been tough and admittedly I'm still working on it. This not to say that I'm a messy person, if anything I consider myself an organized mess. You see, my husband is a mega clean freak and I catch myself getting into old habits of piling clothes up or leaving things out. I don't hate that my husband likes a clean house, in fact I secretly love it. I just need to learn to put things where they belong not next to it (whoops!). 

6. I’m trying to be more compassionate. Sharing life with someone requires you to share their feelings as well. Being selfless in a marriage is crucial to having a happy marriage. This doesn’t always come easy for me but I’m trying my best to put his needs before my own.

7. We don't always have to agree. Luckily, Mike and I see eye-to-eye on most things. But for the rare occurrence when we do disagree and there's a bigger argument brewing, I try to remember that we'll have to agree to disagree (insert patience here).

8. I will always have to close the cabinets and drawers in the kitchen. I figured this one out pretty quickly after finding every cabinet that Mike had been in because he always leaves them wide open. (Honestly, sometime I'll bring him in the kitchen just to show him that every single cabinet and drawer is opened.)

9. Gone are the days of being lazy. There's always something to clean, a meal to prepare, cookies to bake, a husband to entertain, and friends to make plans with. Yes, every now and then a lazy day is needed but good luck finding one!  

10. Waking up next to my best friend every day is the best! Seriously, though there is no better feeling. 

Would love to hear some things you've learned from your marriage or relationships. Leave me a note in the comments below. 

FourThreads

Welcome To Four Threads

LifestyleVeronica Arrieta4 Comments
FourThreads

Hey y'all ! This is my first post and I couldn’t be more excited to finally get things started! I've been itching to start another blog and there's no better time than now. My life has finally slowed down a bit to start this new journey with you.  

Now you’re probably thinking, slowed down...from what? We’ll I got engaged, planned a wedding, got married and moved apartments all in a 6 month timespan (still unsure if I’m super-woman or just plain crazy!).

Since these life events happened so fast, I thought I would recap a few of them over the next few weeks to bring you up to speed and satisfy family requests of more pictures!

On November 8, 2014 I got to marry Mike, the man who surpassed all my greatest hopes and dreams. We got married in beautiful wine country at Trentadue Winery in Sonoma. The vines were full of fall colors, the sky turned cotton candy, and our close friends and family were there to witness and celebrate our covenant.

I’m super excited to start this journey with you and hope to offer a little inspiration. I want Four Threads to be a place where you feel warm and welcomed to check out every day. A destination where I share personal style through fashion, recipes, marriage, beauty tips, faith and everything in between. 

Four Threads weaves together the threads of my life through faith, fashion, lifestyle and beauty.  If there is anything you want me to blog about, please don’t hesitate to comment or contact me. 

FourThreads